DON'T TALK ABOUT THAT BLACK STUFF

And today's etiquette flag goes to Angelicque Blackmon, principal of Howard University Charter School, http://www.wjla.com/articles/2015/01/howard-u-middle-school-parents-say-principal-fired-social-studies-instructors-for-teaching-black-his.html.  I usually reserve two flags for the worst offenders, but for Ms. Blackmon I have decided to be liberal.   It is alleged that Ms. Blackmon has fired several teachers from the middle school she runs for teaching Black History.  How funny that a woman named Blackmon doesn't want anyone to teach about being black.  I digress.  Flag one comes for the rejection of loving your heritage and denying the next generation the opportunity to learn about their legacy.  The second, if true borders on cruelty.  Ms. Blackmon alleged fired the teachers, 4 in all according to reports who had been teaching about black history.  It's shameful enough to fire workers for that reason, but to then have them escorted out by police in front of children, well -  I have never! If these reports are true, Angelicque has some "splannin" to do!  Keep it Urban Classy - Lady T

JOHN BOEHENER INVITES WORLD LEADER TO SPEAK - DID HE BREAK INTERNATIONAL PROTOCOL?

Child, it's getting chilly in the White House.  This week I could not believe what I was reading when the news reported Speaker of the House, John Boehner invited the prime minister of Israel, Benjamin Netanyahu to speak before Congress without clearing the request with the White House first.  I know President Obama catches it, but this is disrespect on a whole other level.  I can't imagine what the prime minister needs to say to Congress that doesn't require the President's presence.  I suspect both Boehner and Netayahu know they are breaking all types of social rules and standards of international protocol, but because of their equal disdain for the President, they are willing to both lay down their "civility hat" and come off to the world as unbelievably rude. This is truly "the enemy of my enemy is my friend."  I couldn't make this up, but only out of the hearts of man can this level of etiquette breakage happen.  So here it is, a big "DOUBLE FLAG" to Boehner and Netayahu for planning a party at someone else's house and not inviting the homeowner to the party.  Click here to read about the complete break in protocol.  Keep it Urban Classy - Lady T

DAD DISCOVERS THE POWER OF SNAPCHAT

The father of two Minnesota twin boys lost his job because he and his sons used Snapchat to bully and racially disparage a 14 yeaer old young woman online.  The father, identified as Deron Puro has been fired because of his son's online Snapchat to an African American girl.  It all began on New Year's Eve when Dierdra Knudson, an eight grader who attends Prior Lakes School in Minnesota received a Snapchat from twins calling her some not so nice things. Click here to read the foolery.

Dierdra's father, Brad Knudson took the bullying very seriously and contacted the twin's father to discuss the matter to no avail.  In the end, the twin's father was fired and Dierdra said it wasn't that big of a deal.  I had to give you a bit of background before I threw the obvious "etiquette flag" on the play, but I also wanted to highlight the dynamics of how bullying affects people.  First the "etiquette flag," goes to the twins and their father for contributing to such despicable behavior.  This signifies a lack of sensitivity training in the home and speaks to some form of racism being tolerated as par for the course among the Puros.  I don't want to see anyone lose their income, but in case anyone doesn't know.  NEVER, EVER post anything online that you wouldn't want to get back to your boss, parents or significant other.  Though Snapchat disappears, if someone takes a picture of it or records it, the information will still exists.  My final "etiquette flag" is on "teen" culture in general. 

Though everyday the press releases stories about the dangers of bullying, teens continue to bully one another unleashing viscous attacks online.  Though I always try and keep it light, the fact that people actually take the time to humiliate and harass another human being online reminds me of the importance of my dedication to impacting young women.  I think I'll have to get back on Empire to lighten things up. Keep it Urban Classy - Lady T

MISS COOKIE COMES TO DINNER

I'm not trying to stay on Empire this week, but I had to stop a minute and throw three HUGE etiquette flags on Miss "Cookie" as she was invited to dinner and commenced to disrespect her former husband, Lucius's new wife and talked so much trash I thought it was trash day.  Etiquette flag one came even before dinner happened.  When you are the host and hostess, you are to sit at both ends of the table.  When Lucius' wife went to sit in her place, to her surprise Cookie had claimed her spot.  Cookie deserves a flag for taking the hostesses seat and refusing to get up.  Though all intentional, it drove home the point of where one is supposed to sit when you are a dinner guest. After staring daggers in her body, the hostess graciously took her seat next to her husband just to keep the peace. The second flag came shortly after dinner when Lucius was taking his medicine.  She barged in and asked him what he was taking.  One is to never ask another person about their medication.  Unless they share the information voluntarily, it is rude to inquire about what they are taking.  In Lucius case, he is battling MS and breaking down quickly, I suppose the medicine is to deal with the symptoms he is beginning to experience.  Cookie you did the fool this evening.  You officially are one of the worst dinner guest landing a third flag when cursing while blessing the food for dinner.  You're batting three for three.  Taking the Lord's name in vain and airing dirty laundry in front of the family seems to be the staple of any red-blooded family filled with murderers, drug dealers, narcissist and the like, but I still would be remiss if I didn't point out the foolishness performed during prayer deserved a big etiquette flag.  I know I probably shouldn't feel this, but I think I'm excited about next week's Cookie's etiquette bonanza.  I know she will at least get me one good post.  Keep it Urban Classy - Lady T

DOES SPORTSMANSHIP ETIQUETTE MEAN PRESERVING YOUR OPPONENT'S DIGNITY?

A recent high school game ended in a score of 161-2.  No, you're not seeing things.  On January 5th, Arroyo Valley High School beat the snot out of Bloomington High School in San Bernadino, Ca. leading to the suspension of Arroyo's coach, Micheal Anderson for two games.  His offense, poor sportsmanship.  My first thought was how does a team that is clearly more dominant even play a team that can only score two points.  Maybe there really needs to be a change in scheduling or maybe the winners could work with loosing teams to help make them better, thus leading to more competition.  Mr. Anderson defended the score by pointing out his benching the starters at half time and asking the replacements to take time off the clock.  It didn't work, they still beat Bloomington like they stole something, which produced cries from the community of unfairness.  Was Coach Anderson wrong, what else could he have done?  What would you do?  He couldn't stop the game, so the choice he opted for led to only a 159 point difference.  At question here, I believe is a question of preserving their opponent's dignity.  Notice I didn't say pride.  Pride is meant to be broken, but dignity is meant to be cherished.  Perhaps once the score reached a 50 point difference, the game could have been called and the guys could have been still able to hold their head up instead of the the public coming to their rescues further embarrassing them.  I have to throw two etiquette flags on this play.  One on the coach for knowing better and one on the community for pointing it out.

5 STEPS TO GETTING ON THE INVITE LIST FOR KEY EVENTS AND OCCASSIONS

Is your calendar filled with invitations from key community allies? You know the ones that lead to paying customers, or are you wasting your time milling around at Happy Hours in the hopes that your next big break is going to be found between chicken wing bites?  These outdated time consuming "speed dating" networking events can be beneficial to meet people, but they rarely lead to invites from key players. To get added to the list, you have to begin to move early and strategically in the year to build relationships and support others.  That means, you are going to have to be ready to spend a little time researching and spending money.  Attending galas, banquets and events cost hard cold cash and if you have a lot of it, you can attend whatever event you want.  But if you are a new business starting out or old one still finding your way, you want to be strategic with your dollars.  Below are just a few helpful hints to get you started.

#1 - Research the event you want to attend and find out who the event planner is if it is an invitation only event.  Once you have done your research, contact a potential attendee and become their plus one, or contact the event planner to find out how to make the list.
#2 - If you want to be seen at the largest charity event, scroll their website and find out when it will be held and purchase a ticket.
#3 - Serve as a volunteer.  Volunteering will help you work up close and personal with leading decision makers.  Make sure you are seen supporting and not just selling your products or services.
#4 - Check social media.  Organizations and individuals always have some form of social media.  They are often hosting contest and repeat what their followers are saying.  Be seen in their feed and win a ticket to their next event.
#5 - Network and parlay this event into another one and invites from other attendees.  You will find the social world is very small. Once you make a great impression on one group of people, it's really easy to get invited back time and time again. 

WILL PRESIDENT OBAMA GIVE A PRESIDENTIAL PARDON TO "EMPIRE" FOR RECENT DISRESPECT

WOW! President Obama had a rough week.  Between the outrage over the whole "not attending the unity rally" and Americans questioning his leadership, I was hoping we could get to Friday without anymore problems.  Boy, I was wrong. The new Fox television series Empire, described as "Dynasty Gone Gangsta" shocked the world during this Wednesday's, January 14, 2015 airing.  Given Fox's history with democrats, they chose not to pretend and came out swinging as Fox executives decided it would be satisfying to deploy the "F" bomb to disparage our president during prime time?  I have to pull my "etiquette flag" and throw it at the feet of everyone at Fox who thought it was alright to let "Fxxx the President" ride on national television. We get it, Republicans hate Obama, but when has the line of free speech crossed over to a platform of such vitriol toward the man with his finger on the button.  Though teaching etiquette is my calling, I thought I would live to see disrespect on such a large stage coming from the mouth of someone who looks just like me reaffirming every stereotype others have of the black community.  Indeed this public tongue bashing cuts to the very heart of courtesy and patriotism. I am the first to respect artistic expression and freedom of speech, but insulting the chief executive in such a visible way, well it broke every etiquette rule in the book beginning with RESPECT EVERYONE. For this most egregious etiquette offense, FOX and EMPIRE should issue an apology as public as they disrespected the president of the United States.